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Why we need to ask for more support

A lot of women need more support and either don’t ask for the support they need or can’t receive it when it is offered.

No one can do life alone. We all need help. We are social and community orientated beings by nature, even the highly introverted among us still need connection and support.

I recently read about a great way to ask for support from Tanya Lynn Paluso.

It’s called SMART Requests and is based on SMART Goals:

S  - specific
M - measurable
A  - actionable
R  - realistic
T  - time

For example, I need a babysitter from 1-4pm on Saturday, can anyone help me?

If you are worried about being called a “taker”, you need to know that there is a big difference between being a “taker” and a “receiver”.  Taking comes from a place of scarcity, lack and fear. It’s all about “What can I get?”

Receiving, on the other hand, is about being in flow, trusting and surrendering. Receiving is a form of giving. When you ask someone for their support, they receiving in their giving.

Have you ever wanted to support someone and they won’t receive it? It doesn’t feel good. I like to be generous and shout coffee or lunch for friends. It makes me happy. So when I do something nice for friend, I am also receiving.

Many women find it easy to give and hard to receive. We are used to doing everything for everyone. It can take conscious effort and commitment to growing your capacity to receive.

In her book, The Queen’s Code, Alison Armstrong talks talks about how women can do less and receive more. It’s time for us to open up to receive. Women run on empty, doing everything for everyone, and even when they are offered support they either shun it or complain about it. No one like to have their offer of support criticised!

I know from my experience in my current relationship, that I can do less and receive more, and it makes us both happier. My man wants to provide for, and support me. And I can tell you, having my man empty my rubbish for me makes me happy and I express my appreciation regularly.

To help you open up to receiving, here are some questions you may like to reflect on and journal about:

Do you find it easy to ask for and receive support?
Where do you need more support in your life?
Who or what can provide you with that support?
Where is someone offering you support that you are not receiving?
What’s one thing you can make a SMART Request about today?
How can you show your appreciation for the support you are being provided?

If you are struggling to receive, you may like to pray to God/Source/Universe for help in opening you up to receiving more in your life.

Here is a a prayer your an use, or you can create your own:

Dear God/Source/Universe
Please open me up to receiving
Every day, I get better and better at receiving
I courageously ask for the support I need
And graciously receive and appreciate this support
I love to be supported and I allow myself to be supported in miraculous ways
Thank you for supporting me and always having my back

I would love to how you feel about receiving and where you could use more support right now.


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