“A circle of women may be the most powerful force known to humanity. If you have one, embrace it. If you need one, seek it. If you find one, for the love of all that is good and holy, dive in. Hold on. Love it up. Get naked. Let them see you. Let them hold you. Let your reluctant tears fall. Let yourself rise fierce and love gentle. You will be changed. The very fabric of your being will be altered.”
I was afraid to attend a women’s circle...
Last week, I joined an online women’s circle and attended the first circle the other day. I arrived to the zoom call with trepidation. I didn’t know anyone else in the circle. And I had also been crying minutes before and was feeling fragile. There were 12 other women on the call. Three Aussies including me and nine Americans. The circle leaders went through the process and invited people to share.
First up people were sharing things very briefly that were standing in their way of participating. I did not speak in this bit even though I could have said that was feeling devastated by something that had just happened (imagine a balloon filled with excitement that is popped and immediately deflated - I was feeling crushed).
We proceed through the various activities and everyone had to contribute. This was scary. I wasn’t in the mood to share with these women that I didn’t know. But I did, and it wasn’t too bad. Later, I volunteered to share and it felt good to speak my truth. It was still scary, but I wanted to show up 100%. And by doing so, I got so much more out of the experience.
The great thing about feeling this fear is that it allowed me to understand that other women may also feel this fear when joining a circle. And that it is perfectly normal until trust is built within the group. Safety is so important for us as women to be able to vulnerable and be truly seen in circle.
I think it takes longer to build up this trust and sense of safety in a virtual circle than it does in an in person circle.
Have you attended a women’s circle? What was your experience like?